As It Is or As I Am – the Art of Becoming

A journey … towards … being

Serenity?

Interesting experience for last night – almost weird (in a good way). Had been to visit D, an elderly gentleman, who was not feeling too good. He mentioned almost going out during the day to get some LemSip but didn’t quite feel up to it. So I offered to get some and drop it in after we had visited J. We left David’s and would have arrived at J’s at 20:00 instead of the 20:30 we had arranged. So we went to Tesco to get the LemSip first. Should have only taken a few minutes. At 20:35 still there! Had handed over my Tesco Club Card and separate debit card at the checkout. For some reason it took the money from the Club Card, which has only 23 pence on it. The checkout assistant apologised and called over a manger to get the money refunded and then take the money from the debit card. This it tuned out was not as simple as might be expected. Anyway this went on for nearly 30 minutes. Eventually I had to get some cash out from the hole in the way outside the store and then they paid the cash onto the Club Card and it was all back as it should be. Now the weird part is that throughout this experience not once did I feel in the slightest bit annoyed, frustrated, impatient. Nothing seemed to bothering me at all. In the past when things like this have happened I’ve either got impatient with people and mentioned it, or felt a voice inside saying “keep clam, it’s not their fault”, or similar. The weird bit is that there were no negative feelings at all. Just a kind of calmness and serenity. Even when the manager said she’d have a word to reprimand the checkout girl I asked her not to do that, as it wasn’t really her fault. Where did all this calmness and serenity come from? I’m overjoyed to be experiencing it and pray it continues… Related to off loading about the abuse or is that reading too much into things?

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