Tears, anger and bottles of coke…
24 July, 2009
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Was sitting with a new client last night, who was embarrassed at crying in front of me. While we sat while together the following analogy formed, which I then shared with the client:
Imagine a bottle of coke, roughly three quarters full. As it gets shaken up a bit, more bubbles than usual start to ride to the surface. If the bottle is shaken enough the bubbles can fill what was the empty portion of the bottle. As the lid is slowly unscrewed the bubbles are gently released with drops of coke appearing at the side of the rim, starting to flow down the edges. This is a little like us. As we get shaken by events so our emotions bubble up inside and start to fill us up, needing a way of release. In the right circumstances (perhaps in the counselling room, where congruence, empathy and unconditional acceptance are present) it is as if the bottle lid is being slowly unscrewed, we start to gently release things, with tears starting to flow. Sometime the release can be quite dramatic, as if the bottle top is suddenly and completely unscrewed and the coke overflows and pours out freely. So on occasion our tears can flow freely and copiously.
However, if the lid is not released on the coke bottle, continuing to get shaken or disturbed, it can eventually reach the point of pressure where it just explodes. This can be like our emotions. If we do not accept them, allowing their gentle release, we can find ourselves emotionally exploding, causing harm to ourselves and others.
It seemed to resonate with my client. Be interested in others thought’s on this?